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Monday, 21 March 2011

This is probably one of the saddest post that I've ever written.  My neighbor's 13 year old daughter committed suicide Thursday night.  They found her around 3:00 am.  I received a visit from another neighbor when I got home from work Friday evening.  She was visiting to let me know of the tragedy, and to figure out how we could come together as a community to help this family.  That's the type of neighborhood that I live in.  We look out for each other regularly, and help each other out in time of need.

As we were talking, she stated that the parents hadn't seen it coming.  The child was being bullied, but they didn't see it as a big deal.  In their mind, she wasn't being bullied anymore than anyone else.  My immediate thought was, here we are another child being bullied, nobody does anything about it, and they end their life.  She was a beautiful little girl.  So much to live for, but in her mind she had nothing to live for. 

I've sat for the past day wondering how her parents could possibly find the strength to deal with this tragedy.  I wondered how they could not take bullying seriously, and chalk it up as her not being bullied anymore than anyone else when it is such a serious problem.  I thought about the guilt that they must be feeling right now.  So many things have crossed my mind.  I wondered what I would say to them when I see them.  I wondered how they could continue to live in a home that was so lovingly built 3 years ago to one that would now hold a memory that would be unbearable.  How does life go on after you loose a child in any manner, especially to suicide.  

What's happening in the world today with our youth?  Why do kids think it's  acceptable to torture another person?  Why are we so accepting of bullying, and so willing to chalk it up as kids being kids?   Most importantly, what's happening to our parenting skills? I guarantee children aren't just acting out in school, they're mishaving at home too.  Behavior problems start at home.  To single out another person and torture them is beyond my comprehension.   

My daughter was bullied in school, and I'm here to tell you that it was not acceptable to me.  I took action.  I let the school and the parents of the girls involved know that there would be hell to be paid if it continued with my child.  At that point there was two things that you didn't mess with 1) My daughter and 2) My money.  I labored for 8 hours to bring my daughter into the world.  She was an investment, you see I invested all the love, time and money that I had into my daughter.  She became my life and my most prized possession.  She still is, I've just added to my portfolio now there's my grandson.  I told the other parents that if they weren't investing in their child, that wasn't my problem, and they weren't going to make it my daughter's either.  

As my readers know, I have been writing about bullying for some time.  You see, it has an effect on you for the rest of your life.  You just don't get over it as some people think you should do.  It affects your self-esteem and self-worth.  You start wondering what's wrong with you and why you're being singled out.  Children don't understand that the problem really lies with the kids who are doing the bullying.  As children you believe what the other person is saying about you, which is why it is so important for the parents of the child being bullied to counteract what's happening.   Children today have no respect for authority, their peers or themselves.  They think it's okay to just say or do whatever they please.  I would venture to say they have no respect for their parents either.   

Wake up America, this is a serious problem in this country.  As I'm writing this article, CNN just reported that Kate Middleton who will soon be marrying Prince William is getting involved in a Charity who helps children who have been bullied.  She was a victim.  Her parents pulled her out of the school, they weren't having it either.  I wonder what her bullies think of her now, lol.   My daughter's bullies are now living a life of hell.  One has 4 children with the babies daddy in prison and the other has 2 children with the father nowhere in sight.  My daughter has a great husband, handsome son, beautiful home, and she's working on her Ph.D.  She's happy.  What's really funny is both of these young ladies now want to be her friend.  They sent her a request on Facebook.  She hit the delete button. 

I pray that this family finds peace and the strength that they need to move through this difficult time.  No parent should have to lay their child to rest.  I wonder how this young girl's bullies feel this morning.  Everyone's life has been forever changed.  They will remind in my prayers. 


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